It was 28 days ago
I came home, hood up
That it couldn't possibly get worse
Because it just couldn't
This was a new low
When I needed a new high
And hope left like
She had never been there before
CliffThere were better things to do than to dwell on the past. Jay knew that. She moved on.
That's what she told herself.
Lies, a voice inside her mind hissed. Lies.
Her bluejay wings were spread out, catching the wind as she sat on the sandstone cliff. There was a sharp rock at the bottom. If hit, instant KO. If she didn't, injuries for life.
One tentative step at a time, she walked closer to the edge. She didn't remember the first time she was here, thinking about this. Or the last time. Or the times in between. She only remembered the pain and the sorrow.
Nick. The testing. The almost-pregnancy. The twenty-four killings. Nick. Nick. Nick.
She could never forget Nick.
As sandstone crumbled beneath her feet, she cringed. Her wings flapped twice, by instinct, carrying her to safety. She paused for just a moment to think. This...was it...and it would be a fitting end for an avian. She could save herself. It was a her choice. If she chose.
One more tenattive step. Closer. Closer.
she may have lost all she had to liars
but that doesn't mean
can steal all she has left
QuestionHinata couldn't help it.
It was those emerald green orbs, those shining eyes that captivated her the most. Followed by his spiky milk-coffee colored hair and the ever-present frown he had on his face.
He definitely didn't know that she ever even had a remote thought of liking him. Kanata always assumed that they were best friends, the two immature toddlers who ran around together since they were little.
And he had always hated that situation. The faster he turned it around to his favor, he concluded, the better off his life would be.
When they were little, they wanted to get married. The thought amused Hinata now, since she knew that he liked that girl who sat in front of him in history class. Fact and closed case.
It never occurred to Hinata that Kanata would have more than friendly emotions towards the girl he had known since forever.
"Hinata," Kanata called for the thousandth time, "why're ya spacin' out?"
Hinata blinked twice. "Huh?" she asked, her midnight purple eyes looking up a
Teardrops Pt. 4Fairy tales
I can only imagine
That I don't have to leave everything behind next month
That I don't need to be afraid of the future
Where I will be alone in a world of predators
And a land of monsters
I don't want to be alone
But I scared the world away
And created more with each pain day
And why should they fade?
Why would they fade?
When I am defined by them?
This is reality
Pain without a soothing ointment
Bloody wounds without bandages
Falling apart like spacecraft in the atmosphere
These are tears
For what everything once was
What clear skies and dark days
Pouring rain and better times
But never coming
One has to say goodbye to forever one day
Because forever is a nonexistent concept
Despite the dream of perfection
And the idea that everything
Is going right and going straight
The world crumbles beneath your unsuspecting feet
And you fall
And you wonder
Teardrops Pt. 3I'm sorry
I failed you
And I failed everyone else too
While I was at it
Now everything is all
TeardropsOne shouldn't take tears lightly
Dripping drops of
I don't want to see again
And nothing in the world is the same
Let GoOne day
I dream to be the girl who doesn’t
Cry herself to sleep at night
Only to be whipped awake
By whatever comes my way
To be the girl
Who doesn’t wish to run
Away for a second chance
To be that girl
Who can do what her dreams
Decide to tell her
And the one
Who can love
But I am the girl who
Cries at night
To sleep for a few sweet
Moments after saving a life
But before waking to the
Sound of yelling and more
And I am the girl who
Wants to start fresh
Somewhere new and away
From this scary place
But no, I can’t be
Dreams, bombed, just a few feet from home
And I can’t love you
And I want to
But you hurt me
But i still
Ever let go
127: It Don't Care, I DoThe road don't care where you run off to
As long as shaking feet fall upon
It's crumbling pavement
And the steady ba-thump ba-thump
Beats like a drum
The road don't care if you're crying
Your broken heart out
And it don't care if you're long gone
It don't matter where you go
As long as you're gone
But I do
I can't live without your beautiful smile
I don't think you know
But tears don't mean a better tomorrow
They just mean you're crying for a better yesterday
School, Tests, and All The RestI'm not smart enough for this.
I have no answer for this question.
The more I search my brain,
The more I feel inadequate.
I cannot fathom the correct answer.
Didn't I study this for hours?
Why is your intellect based
On such trivial things?
Apparently, I am not as smart as I thought.
Why don't I know what to write?
This test is a nightmare.
Why can't I get this right?
The only thing about me I was proud of
Has now vanished
Because my textbook knowledge
Wasn't up to par.
Letters to all the people I have kissedi. Rob
I expected a knight in shining armour but you were
just a boy, just a boy.
you flirted and you teased and you kissed me
at midnight on new year’s eve and set the tone
for that whole god-forsaken year.
I could taste lies on your tongue and doubt in your fingers;
you said you were a taurus but you were gemini all over.
friends shouldn’t kiss in the kitchen and
friends shouldn’t drink gin together and
friends shouldn’t cry, drunk on misery, and
friends shouldn’t break another friend’s heart and
I’m still sorry.
I expected just a boy but you were
a knight in shining armour, silver to the pretty
ivory teeth, who was looking for a damsel and found
only don quixote, tilting at windmills and refusing
to be saved.
we were drunk and you were more beautiful
under the harsh car park lights than I had noticed before
and you were mid-sentence and I was mid-hiccup and
we still laugh about it now.
I was imperfect.
I was the lie.
I was not honest.
For I am sorrow.
I'm not worth it.
There's no tomorrow.
Why didn't anyone listen?
Why didn't anyone see?
I am just a mirror
of what's to be!
I am empty.
I am gone!
I am nothingness.
I'm a fraud!
So please forgive me...
because I'm needy...
and you don't need me:
you need no one.
Dear MeDear me, I know we've had disagreements
And that we don't always see eye to eye,
But the last thing I want for you
Is to feel like you have to say goodbye.
Dear me, I know you've been hurting a while
And I know that you're sick of the misery,
But just keep holding on a day at a time
And someday you'll find yourself set free.
Dear me, I know you've been crying.
I've seen your demons give chase.
Smile instead for things will get better.
Wipe those tears off your pretty face.
Dear me, I know your heart is breaking,
Like your being is shattered in two,
But please, don't give up just yet.
The survival rate is too few.
Dear me, I see that you're struggling,
That you feel like you're on the brink.
But keep pushing forward, keep fighting.
You're much stronger than you think.
Dear me, I feel so proud of you.
You've made it out alive.
You're happy now with all you've gained.
You've reached all for which you did strive.
Broken Dreams"Go ahead, dream big," they liked to tell you.
"Send your hopes up to the sky."
They told you that whatever you believed in,
Those happy thoughts in the back of your brain,
It could all be true if only you believed.
That's all they said you needed to do, right?
To believe it was possible?
Sure, there were also mentions of hard work,
Mentions of putting in effort.
But every time, you were told to believe.
And you believed with all your heart.
Your dreams were larger than the earth itself
Stretching and growing far out of ordinary grasp.
And you worked hard too.
You wanted that dream more than anything.
You longed for the happy future it offered.
But there's a problem with large dreams.
You see, the bigger your dreams are,
And the more time and effort you invest in them,
The more it hurts when it all comes crashing down.
Friendship DeterminedShe felt the pain of a thousand deaths.
Things would never again be the same.
Alone, bereft - with no one to stop her hurt -
Yielding to the need to curl in on herself,
Wallowing in pain, she crumbled.
Internal bleeding that could never be healed
Tore her soul into a million pieces.
Heart aching and refusing to beat,
Maddening agony crippling her mind,
Encompassing her whole being.
Abandoned was how he found her then.
Lacing his arms around her fragile form,
Wrapping her in the blanket of his love.
Acknowledging her need to purge the pain within,
Years of false truths finally coming to light,
Shushing her wails, he held her tightly.
.my head has become a
teeming with ugly whispers and most days
i just want to get drunk
it's too much:
sitting in a history class where
the teacher just drones on
like a broken record about how in sixty years
we'll all be suffocating on the exhaust fumes
of our parents' sins.
driving on a clustered highway
in an empty car with half a tank of
gas getting passed by people too
occupied to live their lives.
contemplating a black hole pompous
enough to call itself the
future as an insatiable
debt worms its way into
the valleys and canyons of
my skin and bones.
give me a scalpel and
open up my skull.
exterminate these savage vermin
from my mind before
my veins turn black from their
toxic desires and my heart stops
beating the moment i close my eyes.
Just SmileJust Smile
The rush of the wind, right beneath your feet.
It's knocked you down, on the left of the street.
People will laugh, people will mock, and people will scorn
Sometimes, like me, you wish you've never been born.
But like my dearest friends taught me, just smile
Smile during the good times and try your darn hardest when dealing with the bad.
This world is bleak, it has a lot to frown over, so just look life in the face and grin.
Tell it, “no matter how bad you treat me. I'm not going to let you win!”
Keep moving my guy, gal, no matter what you look like or how you sound.
There's one thing hatred can't take away from from this earth,
and that's the fact that frowning is more strenuous on the face.
So make your life, and your body feel much better by
HopeWhen no one else ever seemed to notice me,
You were the first to say "hello".
And you did so with beaming joy.
When I felt so outcast and alone from the world,
You were the one who sat by my side.
And listened with an open heart.
When no one else would acknowledge my very existence,
You were the one to reach out and bare your soul to me.
And you made me feel like somebody.
When I thought of so many reasons to die...
You became my reason to live...
And I will never forget that.